Status Quo

LONG RUN: 15.25 miles

NIKE + MILES 2008: 488-ish (slack me, kids, been a long day)

No revelations this week. No big fun, either. Last week after my long run, I came down with a sinus infection. Things got WAAAAY more fun as the week progressed, since the sinus trouble became allergy/sinus fun. This is bad, because my allergy issues attack my eyes...and I lost my glasses in the Gulf of Mexico this summer. Yes, you read that correctly, no, I won't tell you the story.

One completely blood-red eye later, I went to Sears Optical (the optometrist is a good friend of mine) and they hooked me up with a pair of glasses. However, that meant I was at school for two straight days...with ONE CONTACT in my head. Luckily, the blood-red eye was my right eye, and I'm left-eye dominant, so I could mostly see.

It's getting to the point that I'm starting to believe that I am in "running shape." For example, tonight I ran 4 miles, and within 5 minutes my heart rate / breathing were back to normal. I think the weather had something to do with that, though. It's been September Summer down here (mid-80s today), so it's tough to grind miles when you are losing water an an alarming rate just standing outside, let alone running.

As a result of a mini-auction of your truly for the baseball parents, I'll be surpassing my personal goal of $750 by whenever St. Jude gets 2 checks in the mail and posts them to my site. Yes, mother, that means no more faux-tee. It may even be gone by the time you arrive here in Memphis this weekend. Yes, that also means I'm getting perilously close to the Tele Savales / Colonel Sanders look for $2,500 in Team donations that is posted above.

Remind me never to anger another student. They do weird things with computers these days.

Until next time, faithful readers (Steve and Kristin, love you two!!!)

peace love happiness,

Tom

2T4:7

Break on Through To the Other Side (thanks Drew)

MILES TODAY: 14.84
NIKE + MILES IN 2008: 462.08

I have been not-so-secretly afraid of this week. See, up until today, I had not been scheduled to run more than 13 miles, and in fact had not done so. My one previous 13-mile run was technically 12.89 miles (and yes, at that distance, I want every fraction of a mile counted). I was, in effect, slowly building a mental block up about this 13.1 mile barrier (that's the distance of a half-marathon, for the mathmatically challenged, such as a nameless elementary school teacher). I hadn't run FURTHER than that distance in recent memory, and by "recent memory" I mean "about 5-6 years."

It didn't help that the weather started spitting rain the literal second I walked out my front door this morning. The sidewalk wasn't even wet yet, and here I was getting slapped with those famous Memphis raindrops, the ones the size of small water balloons. Oh, this is NOT shaping up to be fun.

Then about 1/2 mile into my run, it completely stopped raining. This is NOT a good thing, though: I had donned my rain gear (okay, a "waterproof" jacket I bought a few years back) and now had to decide between A) running back to the truck to put it up (hate that, makes me want to quit running when I see the truck) or B) unzip & do the cheesy '80's "tie it around your waist" move (hate that more than A, BTW). Chose B, and good thing, because about 5 miles later, it started again. Then stopped 4 miles after that. MAKE UP YOUR MIND!!

Tangent alert!
Have we finished apologizing for all things cultural from the '80's yet? I mean, I KNOW most of it was bad, but do we still need to go all sheepish when admitting to parachute pants, Trapper Keepers, Cabbage Patch Dolls, and the "Take My Breath Away" scene in Top Gun? Remember, this was also the decade that gave us:
--"I feel the need, the need for speed!"
--"Wax on, wax off"
--"He slimed me"
--"Where's the beef?"
--Bill Cosby's cardigans
--Who shot JR?
--Michael Jackson (version 2.0, the sequin glove iteration)
--Bon Jovi (Slippery When Wet iteration)
--Madonna's "Like a Virgin" performance at the VMA, which, well, there's parents reading, so let's just say I heard a rumor that she did that number while "going commando", female-style.

And...I'm spent. Back to the running stuff.

So I'm grinding through my 5-lap dance of joy (each lap juuuust under 3 miles, if you care), feeling...pretty good, actually. I didn't get the whiny face until lap 5, which is high quality. I broke down and started walking, and hit my iPod to see how close I was to 13.1. Uh, try PAST IT!!!!! Just over 14 miles down. Better still, one of my students copied a few songs I wanted to a CD for me, and I got them in the running mix. What comes on at that point, but "Turn the Page" by Metallica. Top 10 "guy song", done by easily Top 5 Metal band? Oh yeah, I'm running now, baby!!! Thanks Drew, there will be a little something in the grade book for you Monday morning.

Oh, then I got home, and Connie had gone to McDonald's for breakfast for the fam, since it's Maddy Shea's birthday. Yes, I ran on her birthday. No, I'm not a horrible parent. She was asleep when I left, and DADDY is the one that picked out her presents, so off my case, ace. Incidentally, and as pennance, my wife decided that this year's party, for a 5-year-old, would be...a sleepover! As I write this, I am recovering from a 14.84 mile run, followed by a "Flight of the Bumblebees"-esque assist in cleaning the house TO CONNIE'S SPECS. Those are only slightly lower than the requirements for a surgery suite, just so you know.

I know it hurts to say good-bye, but it's time for me to fly! (Man, what's with the '80's theme of this post?)

peace love happiness,
Tom
2T4:7

Step back, Connie's great perspective, polka in the South

MILES TODAY: 11.57
NIKE+ MILES IN 2008: 432.16

I'm basically following the same training program I tried 6 years ago, the last time I completed the full marathon. It was conceived by a runner named Hal Higdon. Who am I to disagree with a guy who writes books about marathon training for a living? I'm trying, though, to push a little further on the long runs, since I don't think I was fully prepared last time. This week was supposed to be a "step back" week, meaning I was supposed to run a shorter distance than last week (I think it was supposed to be only 10 miles, last week was supposed to be like 13). Since I'm pushing, I started out thinking I'd run the same route as last week, giving me another 13 miles. Negotiations started early, though, and I revised my plan UP at mile 1, thinking I'd run like 14 miles. I also decided to include my first scheduled walking/water break. I lapped the parking lot a few times, and left a water bottle on the back bumper (God bless runners; I could be literally delirious, and not take another person's water. It's some weird runner's code). That was around mile 8-9, and I was going to run 2 more laps of just under 3 miles each.

Didn't work. Felt sluggish & tired the whole first lap, and crapped out without even trying the second. I will NOT blame the polka, however. It was Dali-esque to run to "In Heaven There Is No Beer," but at the same time, strangely enjoyable. I was briefly transported to a wedding reception, hoisting a beer and singing along, "La la la, la la la la..." Though I am convinced that "Who Stole the Kishka?" is a closet Yiddish polka, and no one can tell me different.

So I got home in a silly bad mood, grumpy and prepared to ruin my weekend. Though maybe ND or Da Bears will contribute to my brightening mood...or sink me deeper into the depths of despair. Then my wife entered the picture. I was kvetching about my run, how I felt, basically being a big, steaming, pile of "woe is me," and she said, "Are you REALLY going to do this after ONE bad week?"

Now, keep in mind, that her tone of voice contained every shred of "SHUT THE F*** UP" a woman can pack in, and with my wife, you know that's a LOT. She gets a lot of practice.

That stopped me, and it was like the moment in Good Will Hunting when Robin Williams says, "I realized something". She's right. It was ONE week, a week where I averaged like 5-6 hours of sleep and didn't do much on my midweek runs. Yeah, the bastard sitting on my left shoulder kicked my ass on every hill out there, for the last 3 miles. Yes, I have a headache. That's it. Next week, I listen more to the lil' dude on the right(eous) side, and it's all good.

NEW MUSIC SECTION:
"Who Stole the Kishka?" & "In Heaven There Is No Beer", the immortal Frankie Yankovic. You have no idea how badly I wanted to take the 2 dollars I spent on those, and go all Quizno's commercial and just eat them instead. In a related note, my Godmother is an evil, evil woman. Hey, who else has Auntie Joanne as a godparent in the family?
"Sweet Home Chicago" - I found a decent compromise version on iTunes. Sounds CLOSE to the Blues Brothers version, which is all I needed. I was NOT going with the version by Clapton (what is this, hump a limey week?) or that sung by Jim Belushi (gotta be Top 5, all-time, in "riding the coattails of a sibling" award voting, though he gets points for being a genuine Bears fan).
"King of Wishful Thinking", Go West. Joe dropped a donation on me, and said I should just download the entire movie Pretty Woman. As a man living with 6 sisters, his worldview has been skewed just a tad towards the estrogen side of the scale. Since he did, indeed, "Go West", and the song is on the soundtrack, it had to be done. It was that or "Must Have Been Love" by Roxette, the pride of Scandanavia!

Joe claims that Colleen can recite the entire movie. Then again, he made some rather off-color commentary about Colleen's ability to pull off some of Julia Roberts' outfits in that flick. DON'T TAKE THAT, MRS. LAREAU!!! Fight back!!! Donate in honor of all Cinderella-storied former ladies of ill repute who have since reformed after hooking up with a multi-millionaire. Both of them.

Yep, I'm instigating. Stirrin' the old pot. Please, you REALLY think Joe would go there? HE LIVED WITH 6 WOMEN!!! Any crack like that growing up, and he would have needed a deadbolt on his bedroom door and one of those fire-escape ladders to survive the onslaught. And that's just from Auntie Kathy. My mom claims that Uncle Bob has a temper. I don't think any non-Shea member of the family is buying that load of tripe. Wait, did I just say "load of tripe"? Okay, time for some more water, or a nap, or something.

Have a great week, those still slogging to the end of this novella!

peace love happiness,
Tom
2T4:7

Family Music Time!!!

This is what happens when you don't wear, or for that matter, even own, the pants in your family:

So I ask Connie & the kids if they would like to add songs to "Daddy's running mix." Stupid, stupid me actually thought they would come up with nothing, or at least good songs. And...

Jamie - the hip-hop version of the theme from "Underdog" the movie
Lia - "Rockstar," Mylie Cyrus
Maddy Shea - "Witch Doctor," Alvin & the Chipmunks (you read that correctly)

and the piece de resistance...

Connie - "Kung Fu Fighting," the immortal Carl Douglas (thanks iTunes, for giving the "Whooa ho ho hoooa!" guy a name)

THESE ARE SICK, SICK PEOPLE!!!

Though I must admit, you folks don't disappoint. I've been walking around the house for the last two days, trying on my neutered-boy version of "Jive Talkin',"

Honestly, does anyone know ANY of that song except the literal two words of the title? Sing it: "Jive talkin,' mumble mumble mum me..."

Every single time I try to run in the afternoon, I come home wringing wet and tell Connie NOT to let me or make me run in the afternoon again. It was 90 this afternoon, and I needed a 6-mile run. Ran 5.4, and hated every second of it. Sweat just doesn't evaporate in this meterologically-forsaken town.

The songs are effective in distracting me from my runs. Usually, I zone out into my Mitty-ian mode, and an odd song forces me to quit focusing on how far I've run, how much I hurt, waah, waah, waah.

Until the weekend, Here I Am; Here I Remain (sorry, Dune reference, I'll stop being a nerd now),

Tom
2T4:7

Music info

I shall endeavor to post the suggested songs that I am running to on this blog. Some things I have learned:

---Uncle Bob & Auntie Kathy's family is both tied for most generous and dead last in the torture department. Two donations, no suggested songs. Look, this is fun for me, you two. No names, because one person wishes to remain anonymous. But look at what your relatives have suggested:

Mom/Auntie Tia: "Sweet Child o' Mine", Guns N' Roses
Kristin: "Jive Talkin'", BeeGees.

---I also love the "suggested list" I can choose from, but I try to stay true to the spirit of the donation and let Connie decide which song. That's how I ended up with the Brothers Gibb (one of the banes of my existence), rather than "Tumthumping" by Chumbawumba.

---Molly is truly hard-core on her list. Matt & Molly better give a good donation, because I am SOOOOO looking forward to some of her suggestions. You just need an EVIL streak to drop "Safety Dance" on a person.

---My playlist is set to random, so the only song I'm guaranteed to hear is the first one in the queue. That song is currently "Last Train Running" by Whiskey Falls. I'll take some SERIOUS coin and change it, but you'll have to dig deep.

I'll be posting a special fundraising announcement soon. Basically, I'm going to auction off the hair on my face...and atop my head. Obviously, going chrome dome will require some serious coin, but the "Rocky & Bullwinkle" faux-tee may soon be a thing of the past!

'Til Tuesday, and other obscure bands,
Tom
2T4:7

GNR, cranberry juice, and my evil wife's perspective

Admit it, the title's got your interests piqued, no?

MILES TODAY: 12.89
NIKE+ MILES IN 2008: 411.94 (wheee!)

Today was a good running day: overcast, cool, and dry. Man, I sound like Tom Skilling, or Dave Brown, for our Mid-South readers.

I tried valiantly to make this the first long run that was also a "no walking" run. I mean, I literally argued with myself for about 3 miles over this point. Good thing that, by that point in the run (like mile 11 or so), I was so gassed that my facial expression couldn't change. Speaking of which...

I've found some podcasts on iTunes that are runners' thoughts while on the road. I test-listened to one of these, and it was LITERAL. As in, dude was ON THE ROAD, RUNNING, and talking. Dear readers, let me assure you that the oxygen required for such an undertaking is not available to this writer. Unless you wish to listen to "Pant, wheeze, gasp, (expletive deleted), (more expletives deleted), (okay, family show, quit cussing)". Though I did pass someone on a path today who was wearing a U of I shirt, and I sucked up the breath to yell, "I-L-L...!!!" I think I scared him, but it was fun.

So I'm slogging through my long run, and I've just passed the halfway point, which is usually where the negotiation begins. You know, the point where "I'm running 13 miles today" becomes "Do I really want to run 13 miles?" or "Now, what specifically was my training run supposed to be? 12 miles? Do I want to push it?" The devil on my shoulder, incidentally, has his own iPod, and it's crankin' some serious Dave Matthews Band/Lullaby music, just to antagonize me. ANYWAY, I'm starting to consider wussing out, and what flips on the iPod? Yes yes yes, it's SLASH'S MOST FAMOUS GUITAR SOLO/INTRO!!! "Sweet Child o' Mine", courtesy of my Mom's suggestion. I like to think the title is an observation, but I know she just digs Axl. Thanks Mommy!

I ended up walking less than 1/4 mile, but it kinda nagged at me. Need some mental exercises to build up that stubborn streak. My iPod claims that around mile 3, my pace was like 5:44 per mile, which is Olympic-marathon pace, so if the Apple company cannot answer why, I'm still calling BS there. Must have been a SERIOUS downhill.

After my run, I got the enjoyment of the "salty face", which is that wonderful gritty feeling a face that has been bathed in sweat about 2 hours gets, on the drive home. Also, the changing of the seasons means it's now high school cross country season, so I get to play Frogger with HS runners and their families on my route. Hang on, "Pity, party of one," Yep, that's me, gotta go...

Smoothies are the underrated pleasure of my life now. Had one for my "breakfast" after the run. Fresh fruit, ice, vanilla yogurt (yes, dear family, you read that correctly), and orange juice...wait, OJ costs HOW MUCH? Hey, there's some of Mom's raspberry/cranberry mix, time to substitute. Connie HATES when I do that, but I'm starting to enjoy the Cran/Rasp combo.

Then I looked at my beautiful wife, who had been IN BED until 15 minutes before I got home, and said, "Man, that was a good run! I only walked less than 1/4 mile, I averaged 9:21 per mile!"

Her response: "Yeah, but you have to run over twice that far on race day."

Thanks, you little ray of F****in' sunshine, you.

Nobody can take me down about 3 pegs like Connie. Especially when she follows with a hug and a smile. No fair, I wanted to be offended! Quit hugging, you know I'm a sucker for a hug!

LISTENING TO:
"Sweet Child o' Mine," GNR (see above)
"Mountains," Lonestar. This is a great song for lyrics. I get chills when I get to hear the chorus:

There are times in life, when you gotta crawl
Lose your grip, trip and fall
When you can't lean on no one else
That's when you find yourself
I've been around and I've noticed that
Walkin's easy when the road is flat
Them danged old hills will get you every time
The Good Lord gave us mountains
So we could learn how to climb

That's all for now, loving reader. Until next time, remember, be good, or be good at it.

peace love happiness,
Tom
2T4:7